"I've given up on giving up slowly.
I'm blending in so you won't even know me
Apart from this whole world that shares my fate."
Just a few notes about myself:
I'm 22, I'm a psychology student in my senior year, I'm overweight, I read too damn much to be healthy, and I have a 139 IQ. However, that number don't seem to do me much good, as I suck at anything more complicated than the most basic of high school math. On the other hand, complex and seemingly paradoxical ideas come easily to me. I could chat about philosophy and logic all day long, and although organized religion tends to make me want to roll my eyes, I am actually a deeply spiritual person.
Obviously, I am not actually Japanese. I am Irish-American, and proud of it. The name comes from a friend of mine who, in her high school days, was about as much of a weeaboo as you could get (and I mean that in the most affectionate way possible =P). She insisted that everyone in our circle of friends pick out a Japanese name and, after some trial and error, Hakurei Ryuu was mine. It translates roughly to "white soul dragon", which everyone agreed was appropriate. Since it's Japanese, Ryuu is the given name and Hakurei is the surname, for anyone who's curious.
I also answer to Valerie.
As for why I'm here... That's a bit more difficult. I first discovered what was happening a bit under two years ago. Some stuff happened and... well, I'm not going into details, lest I draw unwanted attention. I managed to get more-or-less under the radar, and that's where I plan to stay.
However, due to me being the kind of person that I am, I find it impossible to stay entirely out of the loop. At first I was alright as a silent observer, keeping tabs on some of the goings-on and keeping my opinions to myself. Lately though... lately I feel the need to do more. For the longest time, though, I wasn't sure what I could do. I mean, I'm not a fighter, I'm not a Runner. All I do is watch, and hide. But I've seen horrible things on these blogs far too many times, things that might have been prevented had help arrived in time. Damien didn't have to die, and neither did Logan. And neither did dozens, or maybe hundreds, of others out there, all slowly crumbling from within because of that damned Thing's influence!
If there had been someone, anyone, who was there for them, someone who knew enough of what was going on to be able to provide sound guidance, but was far enough removed to avoid being infected in turn, maybe things could have been different. Maybe more people could have survived, or kept their homes, jobs, families, lives. Maybe this whole fucking war could have been over with and Slendy would leave us alone for another few centuries.
I'm not here to tell you how to fight against It, or how to survive on the run. I leave that job to those with the qualifications for it, people who are vastly more knowledgable on the subject than myself. The psychological ramifications, on the other hand... that's my area of expertise. It's what I do best; it's what I've always done best, from all the way back in middle school. I may not be fully trained in my profession as of yet, but I learn more every day, and I already have plenty of field experience under my belt. Ask anyone who knows me, they'll tell you.
So if you ever start to bend under the pressure, come find me. Please. I couldn't stand it to see more people fall into the dark when I know I could catch them if I just had the opportunity. If you're in my area, hit me up and we'll arrange to meet and talk face-to-face. If not, I work just as well over the internet. Just, whatever you do, don't try to punch through by yourself. Getting your head on straight and keeping it that way is crucial to your continued survival.
I will do whatever I can to keep people from falling too far into the dark.
And maybe, if I dig deep enough, I can reach those who have already fallen... and pull them back.